The mother-daughter relationship is both beautiful and complex.
Sometimes it can feel tricky to navigate. However, I think it is one of the most important relationships to invest in! At this point in my life, my mom and I are very close friends and I am SO thankful that we got through the hard times. She’s my greatest mentor.
I invited one of the most awesome experts on this unique mother-daughter relationship to speak at my ‘Ohana Live Event.
Kari Kampakis has written four best-selling books and hosts the popular Girl Mom Podcast. Most importantly, all her wisdom comes from real life experience as a mom of four teenage girls. She has a heart to help other moms avoid the mistakes she made.
One of my favorite pieces of advice from Kari was that as our daughters grow up, our relationships has to change too. It will go through phases from ‘cop’ to ‘coach’ to ‘counselor’.
Here are Kari’s top tips for mothers & daughters to build a healthy relationship:
You are the adults! If something needs to change or shift in the relationship, it has to start with you. Think about finishing strong, not just surviving through the teenage years. What happens in the last few years before your daughter leaves home will set the stage for the rest of their time in life. Continually pursue your daughter and go out of the way for her. She might turn down a lot of your invitations, so expect that. However, your job is to constantly love her, just like God constantly loves you.
Show your mom a lot of grace. She is not perfect, but she would walk through fire for you! If you are frustrated with her, give your mom honest (but kind) feedback about what she’s doing. Now that you are getting older, the goal is a 2-way friendship with your mom. So build her up! Encourage or compliment her and remind her that you love her. This will mean so much to your mom!
The teenage years can be very emotional for both moms and daughters and Kari had a great analogy about a rollercoaster to help us with this:
I am cheering you mothers and daughters on today to soak up time with each other and strengthen your relationship! 🌸