What Defines Our Legacy?
There’s something uniquely grounding about a conversation that centers on truth—especially when that truth is rooted in God’s Word and lived out in the context of the family. Recently, Adam and I had the joy of sitting down with Pastor Adam Koontz, a father of nine and a pastor with a deep love for Scripture, history, and intentional fatherhood. What followed was a conversation rich with wisdom, conviction, and a wake-up call to those of us longing for something deeper in our homes and hearts.
Reclaiming the Heart of the Home
Pastor Koontz shared how his own home—with kids ranging from teens to newborn—functions not out of chaos, but out of connection, structure, and shared purpose. He pointed out something simple but profound: it’s not the number of children that makes parenting overwhelming, it’s the lack of order and intentionality. "If the home is a place of chaos," he said, "more people just make it harder. But if it's ordered with love and structure, it's life-giving."
And isn’t that what so many of us are craving? A home that actually feels like a refuge. A space where our kids can learn, grow, and thrive—spiritually, emotionally, and relationally. A place where God’s Word isn’t something left to Sunday mornings, but a living, breathing part of our daily rhythms.
Family as Our First Calling
What hit me the hardest was this truth: your family is not a means to an end. Your family is the end. They are not a side mission while you pursue your “real” calling. They are your calling.
Pastor Koontz reminded us that no matter how successful you become, how well-known, how widely read or followed—you will eventually be forgotten. But the legacy you plant in your children? That lasts. It ripples through generations. “Your legacy is in your family,” he said. “Not in your résumé, not in your platform, not even in your accomplishments. It’s in the conversations, prayers, and love poured out daily into your children.”
That sobering truth has reshaped how Adam and I think about our own family. It has challenged us to protect our time, our hearts, and our conversations from the constant noise of culture and instead lean into the eternal value of presence.
The Power of Conversation and Presence
So many of us today are sharing space in a house, but we’re not really cultivating a home. We’re passing each other in hallways, scrolling side by side, and wondering why we feel disconnected. Pastor Koontz pointed us back to Jesus’ example—how He gave people not just miracles or teaching, but time. Deep, thoughtful conversations with Nicodemus, with the woman at the well, with His disciples. Conversations that mattered.
Conversations are where intimacy grows. It's where our kids learn to articulate what they believe and why. It's where we show them—sometimes in our answers, and sometimes in our honest “I don’t knows”—that God’s Word has a place in our everyday lives. That they have a place in our hearts, beyond the calendar and the commitments.
Leading in Love and Truth
For parents wrestling with how to lead their families spiritually, Pastor Koontz offered a gentle encouragement: you don’t need to do it all at once. Start with Proverbs. Let your kids ask questions. Let the conversation go slow and deep. Let God’s Word guide the direction, and be honest when you don’t have all the answers.
He reminded us that the Bible is not just ancient wisdom—it’s real life. It speaks into the exact struggles our kids face today, from friendships and identity to perseverance and temptation.
And to the moms and dads who feel discouraged by what they’re not getting from their church or community? His words were clear and empowering: it’s okay to seek more. It’s okay to find a church that feeds your soul and anchors your children. A pastor is not your savior. Jesus is. Go where the Word is faithfully preached, and where your love for Christ is nourished.
Two Major Takeaways:
1. Your greatest legacy is your family.
No career success or platform can replace the eternal impact of raising children who love and follow Jesus. Prioritize your home as your most important mission field.
2. Intentional conversations rooted in Scripture build true connection.
Creating a home centered on God’s Word doesn’t require perfection—it requires presence. Take time to read, talk, and reflect together. That’s where transformation happens.