Our culture is obsessed with love stories.
We see them everywhere we turn – Netflix, Instagram, books and news stories. At the end of the day, we all have a deep desire to find our own “happily-ever-after” as well!
Adam and I had the privilege to share our own love story in a recent ‘Ohana Live Call. We also invited our good friend Jackie Brewton to share her amazing expertise on all things dating, sex and marriage.
Jackie has been helping middle, high, and college students make positive life choices with these topics since 2001. She’s written two very popular books: 7 Secrets Guys Will Never Tell You: A Teen Girl’s Guide on Love, Sex, and Relationships and The Truth About Sex: Real Stories from Teen Guys Like You.
She’s especially passionate about showing students the importance of waiting for sex until marriage.
While sex can be a good thing, outside the context of marriage, it can wreak havoc on many lives: heartbreak, unexpected pregnancies, STDs and so much other gnarly stuff!
God’s Word is also pretty clear about abstaining from sexual promiscuity. Colossians 3:5 says, “put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry”. The guidelines that God puts in place are there to protect us!
According to Jackie, the main reason girls have sex with their boyfriends is because they have low self-esteem. Girls typically find their value based on whether they are in a relationship or not. However, if girls can find their value in who they are and the fact that they are loved deeply by God, they are less likely to make poor choices trying to increase their value.
“If you allow someone to give you value, you also give them the power to take it away. That’s too much power to give anyone!”
-Jackie
Unfortunately, teenage relationships statistically have an EXTREMELY low chance of ending in marriage and they usually end in break-ups.
Jackie encouraged girls not to make life-altering, permanent decisions (such as having sex) in a relationship that is most likely going to be temporary.
However, I loved that she also had some amazing words for girls who have already had sex and may be feeling insecure or unsure about that:
“Your worth does not come from your choices.”
I couldn’t agree more!! She has an incredibly sweet and heartfelt analogy about this that she shared with us on the call. I want you to watch it too!
Adam and I choose to wait until marriage and we can both honestly say that it was one of the best decisions we ever made. Not only is it what God calls us to do, but it set our marriage up for success. I encourage all you girls (and guys) to do the same!
It’s so worth it!
