If you’d like to watch the video of Bethany and Lauren introducing the topic of self-doubt, Click here.
“Honesty is the first chapter in the book of wisdom.” – Thomas Jefferson
Approaching our doubts and fears takes real honesty and we’ll dive into that below. But first, enjoy this quick encouragement from Adam Dirks, Bethany’s husband and partner in Living Unstoppable.
It’s impossible to work on something that is hidden or unknown. That’s why the first step to crushing self-doubt is identifying it.
A great place to start is to look at the behaviors we don’t like in our lives. Then we can figure out why we’re acting in those ways. Often, it’s because we have a belief about ourselves or the world that is creating fear or doubt in us, and that belief determines our actions! The sad part is, it may not even be true. Putting a name to these behaviors and self-doubts helps us become more aware of them, which is important, becuase once we are more clearly aware of them, we can start to work on them.
For me, self-doubt was front and center. I was a surfer who had lost my arm. I didn’t know any surfers with one arm, so I doubted it was possible to surf again, let alone compete professionally. My mom and others around me didn’t think I could surf with one arm either. It would have been very easy for me to believe them and not try. What a different life that doubt could have created for me!
This is the part that matters most. Take 5 minutes or 30 minutes… whatever you have to invest. Write this stuff down. The simplest way to start is to brainstorm 5-15 responses to these questions in rapid succession. Just let your thoughts flow, there are no right answers. Just dive in and be honest. You’ve got this!
What have you wanted to do or achieve in your life, but have stopped short of even trying?
Be specific here. Maybe it’s something you’re not feeling capable of doing, or that others have said you’re incapable of doing so you don’t even try. It could be related to your career, your dreams, your relationships or your health. Take a few minutes and write a bunch of thoughts down now.
What belief do you have about yourself or the world that is stopping you?
Think about each of the things you wrote down above and quickly brainstorm why you haven’t done them. Leave circumstances off the list here. There are always obstacles… but when we truly want something, and we truly believe we have what it takes to go after it, the circumstances won’t stop us. So what is it you believe? Here are a few examples:
EX A: I’m unworthy of love. No one could ever love someone like me.
EX B: I am unhealthy and I know it. I have pain, no energy and no motivation. My life is just like this, it’s just who I am. I can’t change. I have been trying to get healthier and lose weight, but haven’t had much success, so I’m frustrated and doubt that I can change.
POINT OF CLARITY
Pick one belief or mindset from above to address. Write it clearly.
We can’t take on all of our self-doubts or beliefs at once. So pick one that you’re motivated to break through. We’ll work on crushing this together over the next 7 days.
Here’s a format that might help:
“I’ve been unable to (desired action or achievement), most likely because I believe (self-doubt or belief about yourself).”
Writing that out can sting a bit. Ouch. But self-awareness is incredibly powerful. Now you can start to make real change. Well done! Next up, we’ll examine this belief and test how true it is!
EVENT & ACTION STEP OVERVIEW:
If you need a refresher on the topic, or you’re ready to keep going, here’s all 7 Steps: